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  • Writer's pictureErin Maher

How to Turn On Your Partner: A Script

Having trouble being a doting husband, loving wife, or pleasing partner?

We know, it's hard!

But new year, new decade, new YOU!

In this chapter of "How to Turn On Your Partner," we provide a dialogue to stimulate the senses, engage the mind, and ultimately lead to satisfaction and bliss in a relationship.

Follow the dialogue below to get your partner all hot and bothered™** **Exclusions apply. Results may vary. We are not responsible for any or all break-ups or divorces that result from using the "How to Turn Your Partner On" script.**


You: Hey, you know what we should do later?

Partner: Yea, what?

You: We should go to the grocery store….

Partner: Oh, yea? For what?

You: First, we’re gonna get some honey….

Partner: *interest piqued* oh yea?

You: Then some chocolate sauce…

Partner: Mmmmm.

You: And of course, the whipped cream.

Partner: *interest level at 10 million* OH YEA?

You: And finally….

Partner: YEA?!

You: **whispers ever so gently** ...pancake mix.

Partner: PANCAKE MIX?!

You: **still whispering** That’s right, boo, we making pancakes.

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